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GEORGE W BUSH a.k.a.GEORGE THE COWARD |
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Back in the late 1968 when my college deferment expired and I became eligible for the draft to serve in Vietnam there were many young men of great honour and moral courage who refused to serve their country because they did not believe the war was right. Some fled to Canada. Some stood their ground, and went to jail. These men demonstrated the depth of their character by standing up for their convictions at the moment of truth. I was not one of them.
I fully supported the Vietnam War and sincerely hoped that as many Gooks as possible would get it in the neck. However I chose to avoid serving for a different reason. Quite truthfully the very thought of it made me shit my pants.
Luckily daddy, who was the U.S. ambassador to the U.N at the time, knew a way how I could avoid going to Vietnam without having to go to jail (or Canada which he said was even worse). The Texas Air National Guard was known as the “Champaign unit” because it was so full of the sons of the important citizens of Texas. I said “call them daddy, please call them, oh daddy please don’t make me go and fight the little yellow people”, so he called his friend Sid Adger who fixed things up so I could jump the 500 person waiting list and stay home in comfy Texas while other young men who weren’t so important got their asses shot off in Vietnam.
The one problem with being in the Air Nation Guard was that while it might be scary to fly a plane and have people shooting at you, flying a plane without anybody shooting at you is still kind of scary. By 1972 my nerves were just shot to pieces. That was when I missed six months of drills and failed to show up for the required annual medical exam. This could be punished by being placed on involuntary active duty for 2 years , but do you think that was going go happen to me? Are you kidding? Not with my daddy. Instead I was suspended from flight duty, which suited me just fine. Meanwhile I was beginning to embarrass daddy with all my hell raising in Texas so he made a couple more phone calls and I was transferred to the Alabama National Guard.
That turned out to be one of the best jobs I ever had. Turned out they put me on full pay with free dental treatment without ever making me turn up for drills at all.
It sure is good to have an important daddy. Yes sir it is.
